Reader Questions

Mistakes of a Gemini woman….

pisces man mysterious

Slr Asks:

So I met this Pisces man online a couple months ago and we hit it off immediately. We went on a couple dates and things were going well. We talked daily and even saw each other a few times out the week. I had just got out of a situation a few months before and had forewarned him that I would have a guard up for a while. Feelings started growing and so did the chemistry.

I was pretty much swept off my feet the moment we started talking. I messed up the first time by blowing up his phone and when he called back my phone was on dnd (my phone use to always be on dnd until I met him). The second time I blew up his phone, I guess I got use to hearing from him all the time and for him not to shoot me a message or anything concerned me. I also said some harmful things that I shouldn’t have. I got so caught up in what happened to me in the past that I didn’t know what to do. My past situation, the guy ignored me as well as other things so my trust was pretty shot after him.

When I talked to the Pisces man, he told me he needed a few days to think. When he finally contacted me three days later, he was kind of short and claimed that he just wanted to check on me. I saw him a couple more days after that and he still needed more time. Even if I reached out, he ignored me. I was confused because as a Gemini we’re pretty good when it comes to communicating. I know I’ve tried to break the habit of not expressing myself so for him to need more time made me wonder if he was using this as an out to get over me.

Why couldn’t he just tell me what I did wrong? I later found out that his best friend thought I was clingy and tried to plan out his days as well as trips. Which if you know anything about a Gemini, this is nothing close to the truth. He said that he feared that I would be basically be on something like a fatal attraction if he told me he didn’t want to be with me. When I saw that I was instantly hurt and went off on the Pisces man simply because I’ve never been the type of person to be obsessed with anyone.I never had to. For him to seem so nonchalant even through me off. Especially because he was the one who always wanted me around and wanted to plan stuff.

He would even go as far as watch my IG (Instagram stories) but would never respond to a message. To go from building something with whom, I thought I saw myself with in the long run, to now going back to strangers honestly hurts. I know it was only a short period of time but that doesn’t matter when there is chemistry among the two. My best friend seems to think that I shouldn’t have fell as hard as I did for him in the short amount of time. I wish there was some way I could get him back. I just know that this was something different. It was different kind of connection. I don’t know what to do anymore and I wish there was some way I could get him back. Please help.

Slr,

I am trying to imagine if this was me with what you wrote I would probably be acting in a very similar fashion. It would be like the thought where I want to leave you but what if that is just say a one-time thing where you blow up on people? Should I risk it? That fits in line on how you feel you are strangers again because in many ways it is going back to the observation mode. That makes perfect sense with the Instagram story bits too. I would pretty much do the same when I am in that mode.

Fundamentally it just comes down to demonstrating through indirect actions of yours that you are someone he feels comfortable and connected with. Like saying with your posts if you kept showing stuff that he can relate and connect with then he will naturally be attached to you. The bigger obstacle is you in a sense blew up on him so he will be more cautious. In many ways you do have to treat it as if you are strangers again I feel.

That would mean too that if the person isn’t say leaning towards in wanting to be with you then you shouldn’t force it and be prepared to move on. As long as you are certain that the things you do resonate with him then it’s only a matter of time until he will turn around.

If you have a specific question you would like Alan to answer too please use the Ask A Question Form.

1 Comment

Click here to post a comment

  • So I have an update and it’s very confusing. After this issue happened I just left him alone and decided to focus on other things I had going on. I deactivated my IG and everything. I reactivated it about a month again and notified that He blocked me from viewing his page. I texted him earlier this month just to see how he was doing and he responded. Causal conversation. Even texted me the next day. He texted me about some issues he was having and I tried to be of comfort. the minute I told him about a family emergency he disappeared again. Two weeks later I get a friend request on IG from him. I don’t know if he’s trying to be nosey, manipulative or what.