Love and Romance Personality And Mindset

How To Know If The Person Is Lying or Cheating On You

pisces man personality symbolic

So I talked about before how there are obviously good and devious people and how a lot of people just stereotype everyone born under this Pisces sign as a nice guy. But that is so further from the truth as everyone is different and unique based on life experiences. So what is a good way of exposing a phony, so to speak?

Here’s the thing, from what I have seen usually the people who are the most deceitful are the ones that are soft spoken while always trying to persuade you by revealing a lot about themselves quickly with personal details to hopefully break down your barrier. People with my personality type rely heavily in trying to understand people emotionally and in a sense I guess you can say some opt to use it for the good and some for the bad.

There was a person in my life before who I have known for a long time and as a result he asked me for help financially. As foolish as it was, I put my guard down as he was a friend since childhood and so I simply kept giving while trusting his word. Now the funny thing for all you readers is that he was a Pisces too and in terms of values and ethics I would later find out that we seemed like polar opposites.

Once I made it firm that I expected him to follow through with his promise to pay me back, it appeared that he began to tell people fake sob stories all of a sudden. Why? To establish this illusion that he was this nice guy that wouldn’t hurt a fly while telling lies about me to paint me as the bad guy. So ultimately, he ran away while telling everyone that I was just this mean bully who was out to get him, so to speak.

I discovered too that he was cheating on his current girlfriend in so many ways with so many girls and therefore if word got out about that it would definitely destroy the honest and loyal perception that he tries to paint himself as to others. So this experience was showing me the two sides of a liar with this personality type.

He would often imply to me too that his girlfriend was mistreating him. In my mind, my gut told me that a lot the stories he told me were baloney (Not to mention inexcusable). But what I did as a friend was I asked specifically the type of conversations that he was having with his girlfriend to see how bad it truly was. Sure enough, he told me and to me it sounded like he was being a jerk such as having an argument on the phone where if they decided to live with each other that it would be her responsibility to take care of the house pet (In a gender based role type of way).

He then continues to try and justify it more by saying how she yells at him all the time. The interesting thing is that his story is always so over the top that he can’t even tell the story consistently. Again, he tried to use the emotional tactic it seemed where he wanted me to feel sorry for him as if he is so helpless and vulnerable. Another thing I noticed too is that during the time he cheated on his girlfriend he kept making big promises on how their future was going to be like together financially. A funny example was that he brought her to an office that he didn’t even own. My assumption is that it was a way to paint the image of his rising success to further keep her in his grasp like a confidence trick game.

Going back to how he was trying to essentially scam me, you can see that the tactics in general were very similar where he used over exaggerated stories about him being a victim to garner support. The great thing in my situation was that some people tried to verify this and sure enough it exposed him. You can definitely call that a scheme that backfired.

Always look out for the over exaggerated and sappy stories. I would be inclined to say, if they say they were mistreated in a crazy over the top way, ask them politely that you want to verify it for their sake. Their reaction to that will reveal so much. Example, a bad sign is if the person gets super defensive over that request. You know they are hiding something.

From what I saw from that relationship aspect, I think the key on how the girl(s) could have caught him was by using some logic. Example, the guy claims that he is this deep and sensitive guy that is so loyal. When you think about it, if you are deep, sensitive and loyal in that way aren’t the odds stacked up where you want to be careful about your personal details that you reveal to a potential partner as you don’t want to get hurt by them since you are so sensitive? Why would this person want to reveal so much to you so soon? Kind of like salesmen that is so nice to you or all of a sudden talks about his relative that passed away.

As well, some people may say that a person like myself is full of big dreams and ideas and so you can’t really distinguish a dishonest person to an honest person just based on the fact that they are promising the moon. The key differentiators I’d say is how self serving the promise is and to what extent they are using that as the reason why you should continue to trust or stay with them. I think the key thing is a loyal person in this manner wants to grow old with “The One”. So instead of a “Stick with me and I will get you this” mindset it should be a “How can we do this together for us?” Big difference.

This is a trickier bunch to dissect, but it is really easy to crack them by knowing what to say and what to look for.

If you have a specific question you would like Alan to answer too please use the Ask A Question Form.

6 Comments

Click here to post a comment

  • Pretty good post. I just stumbled upon your site and wanted to say
    that I’ve really liked browsing your posts. Any way
    I’ll be subscribing to your blog and I hope you post again soon!

  • Im amazed at ur description…I ve being on and off with a Pisces men for 3 years now. I always felt something so phony that is unbelieable what u say about him painting the office!. Cause I have a feeling this guy Im mentioning, did something very simmilar to me at the beginning!. He showed me and office that I think was someonelses or he was being like a real state broker!. He also made those big lies as you are telling me, to the point of telling me he knew the kennedys babysitters and he is not even us citizen or ever being to the usa.
    From the very beginning I treat him like trash and he would always come back to me everytime I wanted him back…So I started to get used to the fact that I could, send him out of my life and have him back everytime I wanted!. You see I was still in love with someone 360 degree different. So, I would used him for sex and company but I felt that some time I couldnt stand, his faithfull dog type of attitude!. He was like a rug I could step all over. So, later he has changed and try to have the pants and the last shots in the relationship. But he lacks all kind of this, like the way he shows interested is like not real. Also he dont introduce me to anyone who has to do in his life, not family or co workers or friend…Is like he is hidding me or something. Is such an issue that somethimes I maybe a man supports him and his gay!. lol Well the truth is that legally Im still married and I dont know that my probably be too…But honestly I always thought I was the bad one, but I think behind his IM SO GOO GUY , i DONT EVEN DRINK there is someone worst that someone who would drink!. any thoughts about this or suggestions?

  • interesting.
    does that work with pisces women as well?
    cause for me, when i first meet people i stay quiet and try to read them. and when i find something in common i just open up and want that person to open up too.
    so when they dont open up i get cautious about the person, unless i see that it takes them a while to open up, and then i try to follow their lead…
    (i rambled so much i think im off the topic…lol)

  • Ok, well I have been reading your posts, they all seem to make sense, well thought out, and you seem to know your self pretty well.
    Although I have come cross a few things that don’t make sense, you seem to have a problem with trust?? True? What happens, when a man like yourself is testing people to see if they can be trusted, how can they other person truly trust you? You see I am pretty switched on as you are, and do the same things you do in a similar way.
    Similar in the way of, knowing when a man is testing me. I can tell and play the game back. I will be really open, and upfront to see the other person’s reactions.
    Would a man as yourself know that I would be testing you? And if so, is there any point in continuing anything if either one of us will not let there guard down?

    To add to that, let’s say, you hate girls that drank a lot, and you weren’t talking to someone because of there Alcoholic ways….. If that person really liked you, but didn’t have the guts to tell you, or ask you out, and she made out she was out having heaps of fun when she really wasn’t, thinking that you wouldn’t know she was sitting at home, hoping you would say come round (and didn’t know you hated her alcoholic ways) how could you honestly know she’s a liar? In the sense that you just made her feel really nervous.

    Also with the cheating aspect of things, I know that this is about you right, but lets just talk about the Pisceans in general, with your cheating and loyalty way of things. I know someone, which has been all for the loyalty when infact he was cheating himself making out he was being loyal… how does that work?

    Anther question about trust, I once lent someone money, they gave it back fine, they ask me for a whole lot more money, so I gave them my trust a second time, I never seen that money again. Now I believe that this person expects me to trust them with personal things in my life as in way of feelings and how I truly am as a person. Now I lie to them and try to make out that I don’t care about them, that my life is fine (when its not). Would you say it’s fair since I gave them my trust twice, well actually 3times but we won’t talk about the 3rd. Do you think its fair for me to completely trust them when they are playing games as well, to find out about me, in the way of deceiving me and making up lies themselves to find out more about me? How does that work?

    In this post you gave an example of someone making up huge exaggerations. Do you actually know for a fact that they are exaggerations? Do you have evidence that they are lies? I think people have thought that of myself, my x used to think that of me, until he got to know my family and my life personaly and was shocked, and applogised and actually told me that he thought I made up all this crazy shit that continually happens in my life. Just wondering, cause I know someone that is possibly thinking that I make up a lot of stuff for sympathy? When in actual fact I am probably toning it down, and only telling half the story, so I wonder what this man would actually think if told him the true story?

    When you were talking about relationships, and how you hardly ever make the first move. Then when someone seems to be cheating around, you think of them badly. Well can you give me advice on: When the girl really likes someone, based on interests and how they are a good listener, and how that makes the other person feel comfortable to open up and finds that relaxing, and believes that they may have the same way in thinking, but would like to get to know them better to find out. But because they are both non leaders in the sense of making the first move, I would pretend its all about sex. And because I am unsure of how they feel I make out that I am going out with all different people. Who would be in the wrong? It would be me wouldn’t it? How would you suggest I change their mind of me and my actions, because they just drive me crazy, and really wont to get to know them, but because they seem disinterested in me it drives me crazy.

    I guess maybe it’s just not worth it, or they think that I am not worth it.

    Thing is there’s someone that’s annoying me because like yourself, is looking for that perfect partner. Although unlike you I did it the hard way and had a lot of long term relationships, to know and truly understand what works what doesn’t work. I wish I had the sense from the beginning to realize this. But I am generally the type of person that always learns the hard way. I must be a young soul. Basically a person of the same sign as you, is doing my head in because as it seems (I THINK) we have very similar interests as I said, seem to be similar personalities but may display them differently, and like you don’t care to much about looks in the other person. And sex, doesn’t really bother me (doesn’t really being the operative two words) everyone likes and needs sex right? But ultimately I am more about passion and comfort and having something similar in the way we would look at life together. And all I won’t to do would be to get to know them, but it seems impossible, and for some reason finding it hard to let go of something I never had to let go of. Do you think I should just give up, let go, and just lay and wait for someone else that may have all those things?
    🙄

  • OMG!! i have just been reeling from a failed marriage of barely a month with a piscean man and i realized all that was fed to me in terms of emotional garbage as i was reading through!! one thing is for sure…a rotten apple..spoils the entire bunch!

  • I appreciate you honest and enlightening posts! Fun to read! Maybe you could send me a quick note on my situation. Just met this pisces man about 3months ago. Well, I have to say never felt like this with another dude. We create sparks, pretty crazy and unbelievably amazing. And each and ever time we get together I feel like electricity shoots through my veins.. Well, as you can imagine we’ve created a very tight bond in such a short time, so I think I’m falling hard. I am trying my best to keep my head leveled but I don’t think I can hold it in anymore… I don’t want to tell him yet how much I care for him because I know how guys can run a bit when you completely open up, kinda scares a man… My thing is I need some guidance as to how can i tell him I m in deep for him without actually telling him those three words? I need him to know this so I can assess whether he fells the same, without actually telling him. (Does that make sense?) lol. Any hoot, Looking forward to your opinion 🙂 Btw, I’m a capricorn woman, a pig and he’s a tiger and pisces (not sure if that helps) 🙂