First personal conversation with a pieces guy
Julie Asks:
Hello, I just wanna ask regarding this pieces man that I know from a groupwork, so one day I had to interview a manager of a local company for our group project, unfortunately my friend who is assigned to do the interview with me cant make it, so I asked in the groupchat if anyone is free and this pieces man said he’s free. Without any other choices I had to go with him though its a bit uncomfortable since I kinda have a feelings for him, so I arranged for us to meet in a restaurant for breakfast and discussed about questions we should ask during the interview.
It so relieving when one of my friend who is also in the group is currently in the area thus she accompanied us on having our breakfast which is a bit awkward since the pieces man giggles so much and its a disaster when we tries to perfectly crack the half boiled egg. So he did pays for my meal and I ride his car to the company we want to interview and also back to my school since I have not yet got my license. During the interview I stuttered a lot because the situation is too intimidating, I think I was nervous more to talk infront of the pieces man rather than the manager.
Fortunately, he helped in continuing what I just said and yeah Its not a good first impression I did right there. During our ride back to the school we talked a lot mainly because I ask him questions to fill up the silence. And he is eager in elaborating his answer and I was amaze by how much I get to know him in such a short time driving back to school. And yeah He did asked me some questions too which I did not remember all I can think right now is him asking where I live and who else in my group for my other subject.
In between the conversation I raise up about our interview which for me doesnt really went that well, and I said that I felt guilty that he did all the talkings and surprisingly he was guilty that I went silent in the interview. So what did he really thinks about me? Should I ask him out to know more about him and what he feels about me? It really is difficult to translate if he is interested in me or no by those first conversation. He did smiles twice to me in class and offer his sit to me. And he gave me the easiest task in our group activity. I also wonder if I should pay him back for the meal? Im really not sure because I havent went on a date before and never really goes out with guys often. Im sorry for the confusion in my questions but I hop e you could answer this and advice me on what to do. Thank you.
Julie,
I would be inclined to say this is a scenario of too much thinking where all it needs is initiative if your goal is to get to know him better. From the sounds of it he is open to the idea of trying to get to know you more as a person. A good example would be how you mentioned that he elaborated his answers. That’s a good que for you to try and expand on the topic because it’s clear that for whatever reason he is interested in the topic and it’s a good way to see if the person, in this case you, can relate and are equally interested in it. Kind of like someone giving you a gift that they personally love where how you react when they give it to you can show a lot to them in terms of say personality and interest compatibility.
If anything he might think you are too fragile where you can’t potentially handle tough or stressful situations on your own per se. If so that furthers the reason why he wouldn’t initiate things with you. Stereotypically speaking it would be like working at a place that is physically demanding such as a warehouse where everyone is like 250 pounds of muscle and there is one person that is 120 pounds. Like there people would often be extra concerned and attentive usually for the person to make sure they don’t feel excluded.
In my opinion you shouldn’t be asking him out to find out how he feels about you. The more productive and safer way to approach it I feel is you should be asking him out because you want to say get to know him better as a person in a genuine way. That relates to things like paying back for the meals. It should be more of a mindset such as this person did something nice for you which compels you to want to do something for them.