Love and Romance

Does A Pisces Man Get Lonely

pisces man happy

This situation was kind of adorable and brought up an interesting topic on how a person with my personality type views the whole notion of not having that special woman in your life. A few weeks ago my little nephew wanted to share some “secrets” with me as he usually finds that he can talk to me more than his parents. Not surprising too much as the parents are usually the one’s to tell the kids “don’t do that” while the aunts and uncles are the fun people right?

The topic was about “relationships” and I was kind of surprised at how fast early elementary kids were already mingling in the whole conversations about couples and all. And just one super hilarious point I was told by my nephew since the majority of questions I get are relationship related. He was telling me that what some of the kids did in school for “fun” nowadays was that they took random pictures from the Internet of like male models and made EHarmony profiles out of it. We are talking about very early elementary school kids here………. So just something funny to know if you are one of those people wondering why so many people on dating sites don’t respond. You could literally be getting pranked by a child.

Anyhow, this started back when out of nowhere during a meal at a restaurant my nephew was asking me how come I wasn’t married. While I was a bit stunned that he asked that I simply told him that I haven’t found the right person yet. According to him he even asked his dad directly and the answer given was that I simply didn’t want to get married. Parents going for the quick and false answers so they don’t have to explain to the child huh? Lol. So this confused him.

As I tried to help him answer his new questions he started to ask me if I ever had like a “girlfriend” in elementary school or even high school. Again, I told him no as I never found the right person. Keep in mind I just spent quite a bit of time explaining to him about “couples” and all in a kiddy way. So when I said that his eyes popped out in a state of shock and his body looked like it just got pushed back by some force.

He then literally said “What?!!! You must have been so lonely!” The fact that this came out of the mouth of a child was adorable as I know that was an authentic reaction of concern. He even had that sad “Please go find someone now” look on his face. I then started to give some watered down examples of relationships I could have entered into but never did in ways he would understand.

What his reaction made me think of is how I often hear from others that it is just perplexing that a person like myself doesn’t seem like they ever want or need like a woman in their life. Hence, it relates back to topics such as a person like me not taking initiative to push for a relationship which is completely backwards to how most other people would approach it.

Now generally speaking I don’t think I am too different than most people in the sense that we are all looking for that person who we will be compatible with on a relationship level. I’d love to have that one woman in my life. Do I get lonely by not having this person in my life? I would say no in the traditional sense and that can at first be a tricky thing to understand if you are thinking about it from a standard mindset.

From my perspective I find that many people often treat a relationship like a cup of coffee. Basically, it’s something that is relied upon to say wake them up in the morning. Therefore, it’s like people “need” to have coffee in their life to handle fatigue. For this reason I have always avoided things like this to not become dependent on it per se as a way of living. Now think of it with this example on the reactions I usually get from people when I tell them I don’t need the coffee. Very often when I work on things with people everyone is asked if they would like some coffee. While everyone says yes as they need that as a pick me up I usually say no as I don’t need it. I’ll come back to this, but the important point to keep in mind is how I said no to this as I don’t need a “pick me up” as like a form of energy in this case which is what the coffee was being presented as. Does this mean I don’t like to or want to drink liquids period? I think everyone can see that would be ludicrous as we all need/want something to stay hydrated right?

Now in this example you should think why I don’t need that coffee in that way. Generally speaking, I try and take care of my life as a whole to ensure I would be energized for the day. That means everything from eating healthy, lifestyle habits to stay fit, having the right bed and pillow to make sure I get proper rest, etc. So when someone asks me if I need that coffee I actually don’t. Does that mean my life wouldn’t be better if I had something to drink? Of course it could be better as in this case you would literally feel “empty” if you never like drank anything. You’d probably dehydrate.

Here was actually another good real example using coffee. One day while on the job the company decided to treat everyone by bringing a commercial espresso truck of sorts. Most of the days were consisting of like 12 hour+ days for everyone so I guess they figured this would be a great way to energize people. Now to my knowledge they would just be serving coffee. So again, I actually still had a lot of energy and didn’t need anything like that. Some new people who I never met before thought it was weird how I manage to like not fall asleep without coffee.

As one of the assistance came to take some orders for people as they wanted to make sure everyone got something I was literally the only one to say I’m good. While the other workers just confirmed that I wasn’t interested in anything the assistant felt weird that I didn’t want anything. After making the rounds he was persistent in asking me again on whether or not I wanted anything. I reaffirmed that I didn’t need it and that I don’t drink coffee.

Again, he still felt I should get something as technically this was supposed to be a reward of sort for people’s hard work. So afterwards he asked if I wanted like raw juice or a fresh smoothie as they had that too. I was surprised as again I thought that was just a truck that served coffee. Those are often the type of stuff I consume as for me anyways I find that it makes me healthier overall which in turn naturally gives me that long-term benefit. So I said yes to ordering one. In this case everyone did get something to drink even myself. The key to matching me up with something was that the drink wasn’t necessarily something I needed right at that point. Instead, it was a good match that complimented my overall lifestyle habits.

So let’s think about this if we changed the question to “Does a Pisces man get thirsty?” Well, technically yes of course I do. People often say though that once you get thirsty that means you are already dehydrated. Therefore, I try to make life choices where I will naturally stay hydrated in a consistent way. So for me in most cases drinking something in this case has to do more with whether or not it makes me better overall.

This is very similar I feel in talking about the subject of loneliness and relationships. For myself I try and live a balanced lifestyle which means doing the things I am passionate about and staying healthy physically and emotionally. Because if one of those life balances goes out of whack then I could all of sudden get say very depressed. Hence, I could then easily see myself trying to just find any woman to fulfill that void. Let’s face it, like in this case having the companionship and emotional bond with another woman can be a pretty powerful thing. In many ways, it can easily supersede all of the other positive things you do to be positive in life. It’s almost like this example I heard with food where if you wanted vitamin C apparently a bell pepper has like three times more vitamin C than an orange. So if having a woman in my life is like having a bell pepper instead isn’t that better?

Like in this example too, I feel I shouldn’t be wanting bell peppers in my diet because I am always vitamin C deficient per se. If anything, I should be in a situation where my lifestyle gives me an adequate amount of nutrition period. So, if I am introducing bell peppers into my lifestyle now then it should make it way better.

If you think about it too it makes sense why a person with my personality type would be very attentive or in tune with others where it seems like we have so much to give while not expecting anything back. Because in a way I am taking care of myself to be able to be the best for the both of us. A lot of times though people form the relationship where they aren’t really happy with their life in general. Therefore, how can they give their best when they aren’t at their best?

That of course can create the downside in finding a significant other. Because like most things in life unless you have a compelling reason to do so most likely you won’t. Example, if someone was unemployed where they are desperate for money they will be more likely to try hard to start that business of some sort versus someone who has like a cushy stable job without fear that if they don’t get that business running then they won’t eat for the day.

Keep in mind too that everyone makes different life choices that would obviously alter to what extent they can be happy and energized organically in life. Example, if I was an individual that took drugs or something like that then for sure that would mess up my ability to manage my emotions. But make no mistake about it. Just because a person like me isn’t lonely in the needy/depressed way doesn’t mean we don’t actually need to say find love. Like for myself I just manage my emotions efficiently to not fall into that rabbit hole of desperation per se.

Hopefully those examples make it a little clearer. It should help you better understand how to approach a person like me too and not to take non-initiative as like a sign that they are positively disinterested in a relationship period.

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15 Comments

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  • Very well said Alan. You have spoken on behalf of 100 of thousands of people who simply prefer to stay alone rather than finding or staying in relationship with an unsuitable partner. Here in east where relationships are thought to be forbidden of sort, some of us simply refuse to get marry untill late age because of not finding the ‘right’ partner. Although some of us give up into marriage due to parents or social pressure . But i find it very interesting the way you explained about keeping your life in such balance that you do not become dependent on a partner or a relationship. If you hadn’t explained here that how do you manage to do it , like others I would also be asking you ‘ don’t you get lonely ‘? Type of questions. Now if we see people with your personality still single, it will make sense as to why they have preferred to stay alone.

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  • Interestingly enough, reading comments like yours on how there are cultures that say force people to get married or shame them for being a couple is part of that life balance. Example, people often constantly worry and stress over the things they don’t have. The common example here would be the “All my friends are in relationships and I’m not” type of situation where they then panic and compromise their values to in a sense fit in. Reading stories like those though makes a person like me simply appreciate things more.

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  • Flower,

    This is off topic but were you affected by that large earthquake that just happened recently? It just crossed my mind as you mentioned “here in the east” in your comment and all the news headlines here had things like “Earthquake in the East”. Hope all is well.

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  • Alan, hi again. It seems that there is some technical problem because i typed my answer to your querry 4 days back, but it seems that my answer has not reached you. I’m confused whether to send you answer again? ?

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  • Actually i sent a copied link to a page of website where there was news of a powerful earthquake of atleast 7.1 magnitude in my neighbouring cities of my country like Islamabad, Lahore etc. But luckily no one was hurt as the center of earthquake was too much deep inside the earth. People were really scared here. I appreciate that you cared to ask. So considerate of you Alan. ?

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  • Ah, you are right. I just checked and it looks like the site dumped your response in the spam folder. Just manually took it out now. It was probably because of the link. Silly site should know better for regular posters……..Just for reference too, if your comment doesn’t come up right away and you are not a first time poster then something happened like this.

    Glad to hear you are okay! 😀 Was starting to worry that something did happen. Looks like earthquakes are still happening in the Eastern side of the world in general too. Hope everyone is safe.

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  • “A powerful 7.8-magnitude earthquake in Ecuador has killed at least 77 people and injured more than 500, Vice-President Jorge Glas says.”
    I feel so bad for this recent incident. You were right Alan, the incidents of earthquake are increasing all over the world . ?

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  • That count is apparently a lot higher last I checked. 🙁 Can’t really prepare for things like this too.

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  • Hi Alan, i wanted to ask you a question about people with your personality or of Pisces star.. Alan as i get from information that you have provided about your personality, you or a person with your personality seem to have finest set of habits or nature that any human being can have, e.g. Being kind, gentle, compassionate, no drugs or smoking, monogamy in relationship, and preference for no sex before marriage, no lies or cheating to one’s partner, religious, God fearing, family loving, one who sees good in every one, non-judgemental, loyal and caring to their loved ones, and so on..
    In other words it gives a picture of an ideal Human being. My question here is Alan that what could be Weaknesses or short comings of a man with your personality? If there are any, because till now I could not observe any unfavourable habbit or nature in personality of a pisces man from information that you have provided. Kindly put some light on darker aspects of personality of a person like you too.. ?

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  • Oh, I thought posts like the ones of me “Becoming Cold And Completely Disconnecting From Another” would be an example of the not so pleasant side. Or at the same time, there are probably a ton of people who consider those positives you mentioned as negatives depending on the type of person you relate to. Or for things like weaknesses I would attest the “positives” being exactly why I have been taken advantage of a lot as an example whereas someone with a more aggressive and stern personality would have none of that. Hence, sometimes even I need these kinds of people in my life to balance it all. No one is perfect of course and those are just some of the examples of it.

    If that isn’t exactly what you mean maybe you can give me just some generic examples which may give me some thoughts on what to write for another post to better enlighten your question

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  • First of all Happy birthday to me, as its 27 April here. ???
    Alan, partly i agree with you, where like you said that due to your ‘weaknesses ‘ you were always taken for granted… But these weaknesses in my view will still be considered as ‘Positive’ traits universally , because they harm no body except the one who owns it. What i was talking about is the darker aspect of one’s personality that usually no one likes to reveal, or in his/her own mind accept its existence, for the fear that they might loose that delicate balance of their life which they have achieved and maintained to make believe themselves that nothing can be ever wrong with them. Although in my view unless you don’t bring yourself to accept your defficiencies, weaknesses, or shortcomings in your personality or nature, you don’t evolve into complete mature person. And i also believe that unless we don’t acknowledge the complicated pitfalls or abnormality in us, we can’t help to improve it. I hope you get here what im trying to convey to you. ?

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  • Happy Early Birthday!

    So technically what you are saying is I get to cheat a bit since it is not the 27th yet here to get you a present……okay, here are some flower pictures I took for you Flower 😀

    red flower pisces

    purple flower pisces

    I understand what you are trying to get at I believe with the negative traits. A lot of people, including myself, though would consider some of the stuff I mentioned as bad in the overall picture as it can affect others. Take the being cold and distant example. Imagine you literally just did something extremely malicious to me where I know 100% you did it purposely and intentionally. Result, for whatever reason I had to go through a long negative period in life as you were so proud of your actions while laughing at me.

    One day you get some kind of life injury or whatever where I happen to be the only person on earth who can cure it for whatever reason. Because in my mind you are gone from my life I wouldn’t care to know in any form what is happening to you currently. I wouldn’t want to know because in many ways I have an extreme weakness in wanting to help people and giving them the benefit of the doubt. So instead I just stay away from them as a person in a sense. To me I would imagine that is pretty darn cold by a lot of people’s standards.

    The reason are simple too. As you kind of mentioned it’s about recognizing things like weaknesses and shortcomings. I don’t have a significant other at the moment as an example to give me that love/energy when I am down. So like here if I was to even invest my energy in that person above it’s biting off more than I can chew I feel. So it all inter-relates as to why I am so reserved and such usually. I am exaggerating of course, but like here would you rather have me stay invested in that person’s life to help them only for it to drive me off the edge?

    For me anyways that’s just the trade-off too of things such as not taking drugs, drinking alcohol, etc. Because I don’t try and kill the emotions I feel I have to approach things “manually” to deal with like say harsh stuff. There are probably more efficient ways of approaching it in life of course. But for me anyways I haven’t discovered that as every day is a journey to learn and grow.

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